OWN IT!!!!!!😉

1 Corinthians 15:10 KJV –¹⁰ But by the grace of God I am what I am: and his grace which was bestowed upon me was not in vain; but I labored more abundantly than they all: yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me.

This blog is very personal to me based on my experience over the last four years. In 2020 there was a major shift in my life. I had gotten an instruction from the Lord to leave where I was without knowing where I was going. I was told that I was embarking on an Abraham’s journey. To leave was not easy as my roots in that place ran deep. The sacrifices and investments in a multiplicity of ways were great. That was the place of my birth and where I had an identity. I was very comfortable and poised for another promotion that I believe was in keeping with prophecies that I had received prior. Leaving shook my whole world, my family and those that I had real relationships with. In the midst of my grieving what I was perceiving at the time as a loss, the adversary worked hard through speculations and rumors regarding my departure. The season of transition and all its associated challenges were survived only by the grace and mercies of God.

I was in a Seers’ training with Prophetess Ana Werner online and she paused and said. “I see God releasing new mantles and assignments”. While she was saying this, I had an open vision where I saw myself being robed with a new garment. This robe was pristine white with a bold beautiful blue. I asked what it represented and why it was so big, and I was told it is that of the Apostle and that I would grow into it. I, like Mary, pondered that vision in my heart and said nothing. A few days later I got a call from someone saying that a promotion was coming. For the next couple of months random people started to confirm this word. Based on all this I decided to really look into it as I had resolved in my mind that I had other offices prior, and I didn’t think I mastered those, so to have a change of office, I struggled for a while to wrap my heart around it. God would have it that we were having a leadership prayer meeting months after and Prophet Junior Mohalland said the Lord told him that I was an Apostle and that I should be addressed as such, I shared with them the vision etc. and he said he had known for a while and each time he called me Pastor it smote his heart. Other leaders started to share similar sentiments. At this point I was a little nervous as I felt like God was pushing this faster than I wanted. Then I started to get confirmations about the Apostleship from random persons who were clueless about what was happening in my life. I still struggled for a while. I had struggled with the Pastoral office too because at the time I had some close relationships that said my gender was wrong for this role. I wrestled with God on that because to be a Pastor was never a desire. I just wanted to love my God, Serve Him and simply serve His people when the opportunity arose. When I told God I was not going to Pastor because of my gender He simply said, “Are you going to obey me or not?” He did not feed into my emotional tantrum or my arguments as to why this was not the best thing for me. That one question silenced me because I sincerely have been pushing towards PROMPT OBEDIENCE. Man, that question still rings in my heart whenever I get peculiar or difficult instructions.

This blog is not to settle any scores, its not to clear any air, its not to justify any action. This blog is to edify someone who is struggling with an office, a gift, an assignment or an instruction that God gave. It wasn’t until I embraced or owned the office of the Apostle that I found peace, joy, comfort and started to see some of the benefits and works associated with the office begin to manifest. Because God’s intention towards His children are of good and never of evil, everything that He gives us to do or calls us into will benefit us. We will have awesome results that will often extend throughout our generations. There will be increases of all sorts.

I am on a journey to fit into this office, but by the Grace of God I am what I am and I will labor to grow and become who I have been predestined to be. Interestingly the Apostle Paul’s journey in his apostleship was riddled with people saying he was not an Apostle, even today there are those that reject that he was a legitimate Apostle. In Galatians 1:1AMP he said, “1 Paul, an apostle (not commissioned and sent from men nor through the agency of man, but through Jesus Christ—the Messiah—and God the Father, who raised Him from the dead), and in 1 Timothy 1 KJV he said, “1 Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ by the commandment of God our Saviour, and Lord Jesus Christ, which is our hope;”, The Apostle Paul had a solid relationship with the Lord Jesus that stood the test of time. At the end of the day, we will be judged according to God’s standards, we will be rewarded according to deeds that please Him and that He approves. Whatever we hear, we have to first ensure it is from God and not borne out of a soulish desire. I often share with people that when they hear things in the spirit that carry a lot of weight and responsibility, to fast and go through a period of deep consecration to ensure that this is the word of the Lord. I did all this, and this helped me to have a resolute stance where my calling is concerned.

For those who God has been speaking to and you have been struggling to submit because it seems hard to do, or it doesn’t make sense, or you feel you are not qualified or you have naysayers, or you are going to have to let go of something or someone, let your Love for God be the motivation for your submission. I said yes to Him out of love for Him. The Word says in John 14:15 AMP, “If you [really] love Me, you will keep and obey My commandments.” Obedience to God’s written and spoken words is evidence of love. We see where Christ was rejected, they did not believe He was sent either and saw Him as darkness when He was the epitome of light. You won’t be able to control people’s view of your obedience. Follow Christ’s example, He “made Himself of no reputation”. The Greek word in the Helps Word-Studies for that phrase is kenóō (ken-o-o), – “properly, to empty out, render void; (passive) be emptied – hence, without recognition, perceived as valueless.” Although Jesus was God in flesh, He made Himself of no reputation by emptying Himself so as to condescend to the state of mere men. The Creator looking and acting like what He created. The Glory of God had to be veiled by flesh while on the earth so man could behold Him. So when we have been entrusted with gifts, offices, assignments and given instructions, He said to me while writing this blog, “OWN IT, BUT DON’T ACT LIKE YOU ARE THE ORIGINATOR OF IT, NEVER LOSE SIGHT OF THE FACT THAT YOU ARE A STEWARD OVER EVERYTHING GIVEN OR ALLOWED TO DO.” 2 Corinthians 4;7 AMP, “But we have this precious treasure [the good news about salvation] in [unworthy] earthen vessels [of human frailty], so that the grandeur and surpassing greatness of the power will be [shown to be] from God [His sufficiency] and not from ourselves.” Everything we are given or are allowed to do is for the glory and honor of Him that called us. Let’s be mindful lest pride, anger, jealousy, hatred, comparison and competition consume us and rob us of our rewards.

God is a great husband and a gentleman to His wife the church. He opens doors for his wife. Allow Him to do that for you and do not run ahead of him. If you push to open the door yourself, it will be easy for you to compromise as you will have to rely on your own strength and ability to keep it open.  Romans 12 AMP says, “³ For by the grace [of God] given to me I say to everyone of you not to think more highly of himself [and of his importance and ability] than he ought to think; but to think so as to have sound judgment, as God has apportioned to each a degree of faith [and a purpose designed for service].  ⁶ Since we have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, each of us is to use them accordingly: if [someone has the gift of] prophecy, [let him speak a new message from God to His people] in proportion to the faith possessed; ⁷ if service, in the act of serving; or he who teaches, in the act of teaching; ⁸ or he who encourages, in the act of encouragement; he who gives, with generosity; he who leads, ^[d]with diligence; he who shows mercy [in caring for others], with cheerfulness.” He will make the way for you to become who you need to, He will qualify you for where he is positioning you, He will equip you for what you need to do, He will make resources available for the assignment’s completion and He will send Helpers when you have exhausted strength, or lack the skillset or mindset.

Beloved ones of God, love God with all your heart and obedience will be less difficult. If people don’t agree or believe in you or support you, or if they get angry and malicious, your responsibility is to guard your heart against anger, bitterness and hatred. Do not take the bait of offense. It’s ok if you are misunderstood. Keep your hands clean, heart pure and watch your speech.  Minister according to the proportion of faith and do not merely copy other servants as it will lack weight in the spirit and be ineffective and in some cases, earn you beatings for illegal operations. Humble yourself under His Mighty hand and allow Him to lead and direct you in all your ways. Do not run ahead of Him, do not lag behind either, walk With Him. You have nothing to prove to anyone. Keep your eyes on Him that Called you. Aim at improving self, enduring His processes and doing well to remain relevant through fasting, prayer and the study of His Word. Love His people and serve excellently in every and any capacity.

Apostle Nicholeen Williams, Elected and Appointed by the Lord Jesus Christ.